February 2011 Archives
Dear Liza: My husband and I have two kids, aged 5 and 2. We don't have a Will or anything written down. Most of our friends don't either. Is that so bad? You know, I totally have sympathy for you. And, believe me, you are not alone. But here's the thing, you really, really should take a little bit of time and write a Will. It doesn't have to be elaborate. It doesn't have to be expensive. For less than the cost of a date night, you can go to www.nolo.com and write a simple, effective Will that nominates guardians for your children and puts a simple plan in place to manage assets for your kids until they're old enough to manage those assets for themselves. You can go to the library and create a Will with a book for free. You can work with a lawyer and put together an estate plan. But, here's the thing: Without a Will, a judge would have to decide who to appoint as guardians for you children until they turn 18. Without any sort of plan in place, your children would inherit everything you've left to them (equity in your house, life insurance, and anything else youv'e managed to save) when they are only 18--which, honestly, is way too young, isn't it?
There are lots of reasons responsible, caring parents such as yourselves don't get this done. Procrastination is only part of it. There's also denial, exhaustion, not knowing who to pick as a guardian; not knowing how to do it, not knowing what to do. I recently wrote a longer blog at Mamapedia.com about exactly this that I think you'll find helpful. But whatever is holding you back, please commit to getting this done, soon. In an ideal world, it will never matter. But, if it does matter, the people you love the most will so appreciate your thoughfulness in planning ahead. Think of it like that car seat, those immunizations, those trips to the dentist--one more parental thing your kids need you to do for them.